MOVIE REVIEW: "BREAKING DAWN"

I went to the movies to see Breaking Dawn Part 1 tonight with two of my guy friends who just happen to be engaged to one another. "We're actually paying for Prop 8 by going to this movie," one of them joked as we laughed, slowly realizing that that's what we said at the last one, too. Woops.

Chad went into the theater to get seats and Patrick and I stood in a twenty minute line for some popcorn. I looked around while we waited and was not surprised to find that we were completely surrounded by teenage and middle-aged women. We finally got through the line and made our way to the theater's entrance, where the guy ripping tickets mistook Patrick for my boyfriend.

"Enjoy your movie!" he said to me sweetly, then gave Patrick a knowing look and whispered something to the effect of, "I know, man. I know." Unable to help ourselves, I chirped excitedly, "Come on, honey!" and Patrick rolled his eyes, groaning, "I can't believe you dragged me to this."

We found our seats and soon enough, the burly theater employee who mistook Patrick for a straight man was making an announcement that the show was sold out and we'd need to all scoot in and make room for anyone who might be coming in at the last minute. The air hummed with the buzz of excited girls. The lights went down and several people applauded. The previews began, and this time it was us who found ourselves giggly and excited: if it was anything like its predecessors, this film promised to accidentally give us several good laughs.

Boy, did it deliver.

I will say this: Breaking Dawn seemed better to me than the other Twilight films. I mostly enjoyed it. Kristen Stewart seems to finally be getting the hang of this whole acting thing, and for the first time, I found Robert Pattinson to be kind of more than just mildly attractive. Hooray for them.

But I'll also say this: I laughed in parts that weren't supposed to be funny. That shouldn't happen. You don't see me cracking up in battle scenes of The Lord of the Rings or Harry Potter. Because I'm not supposed to be laughing. And so the directors and the people who do the music and the special effects and the actors do something to make sure I'm not going to laugh. They do their jobs. 

If a pack of wolves can speak to each other telepathically, I'm pretty sure they don't do it in voices from Transformers. Because that would be silly. But it happens in Breaking Dawn. 

And you absolutely can't just throw an ending scene like that into a film A.A. (that's After Avatar, if you're wondering) and think that I'm not going to notice and be offended. That's plagiarism, people.

I'm still pissed off that we'd let someone who was supposed to be our heroine just up and get married, then knocked up at 18 and not say anything about it. Most of the issues I had with this movie stem directly from issues I have with the books, so I promise to get back on my high horse very soon and start posting weekly. There's so much to say, and watching this film has motivated me to pick up where I left off. In such a timely fashion.

So even though I did find myself ever so curiously enjoying this film much more than I thought I would ever enjoy something from the Twilight franchise, I'm still definitely on Team Get The Hell Out.